Parenting is an adventure: a story of everyday joys and battles. A common worry is around the baby’s sleep and especially around overnight sleep. It’s confusing to hear conflicting opinions that babies can sleep for 12 hours straight to multiple night wakings is normal. This article is for the parents who are rocking their baby back to sleep at 2 AM and hoping to find a balanced opinion on the internet to resolve anxiety and worry about your baby’s sleep.

Sleep Cycle

Straight 12 hours of night sleep for babies is a myth. Even adults sleep in blocks (called sleep cycles) of approximately one and a half hours, and these blocks add up to seven and a half to nine hours of sleep that most adults find refreshing. Having practised it for decades, adults have mastered the ability to connect the sleep cycles seamlessly so that it looks like we have slept continuously through the night. Babies have shorter sleep cycles that range between 40 to 60 mins and as they grow older this sleep cycle matures and lengthens to one and half hours by around two to four years. They are also learning to connect sleep cycles by themselves and till such time, they need help to return to sleep at the end of the sleep cycle every 40 to 60 mins. Your child will sleep through the night only between the age of two to four years and the exact milestone varies between children and even between siblings.

Night waking could be due to hunger, discomforts like wet diapers, hot climate or developmental leaps including teething or simply a gradual transition towards independent sleep. The following gives the range of night wakings age-appropriate wake up due to biological needs – hunger and transition:

Understanding Nighttime Wakings for Different Ages

(By Age group, night sleep duration range, number of night wakings due hunger and recommended bedtime)

• 0–3 months (Newborn), night sleep: 8–10 hrs, night wakings: 3-5, bedtime: 8–10 PM
• 4–6 months (Infant), night sleep: 9–11 hrs, night wakings: 1–3, bedtime: 7–8 PM
• 7–9months (Older Infant), night sleep: 10–11 hrs, night wakings: 1–2, bedtime: 7–8 PM
• 10–12 months, night sleep: 10–12 hrs, night wakings: 0–1, bedtime: 7–8 PM
• 2–3 years (Toddler), night sleep: 10–12 hrs, night wakings: 0, bedtime: 7–8 PM
• 4–5 years (Preschooler) 10–12 hrs Rare 7–8 PM

Attending to discomforts

Attending discomfort is the starting point. Introduce a diaper change in the night if necessary or switch to a different brand that holds better for night sleep.

Studies say that infants and toddlers sleep better in rooms around 22–24°C. Dress the baby comfortably to avoid overheating or in tight clothing or caps. Ideally dress the baby in one light layer less than an adult would wear for the same room temperature. If the weather is cold, prefer sleeping sacks over blankets for babies, especially since the sleeping sack tends to stay put when the babies move around and is considered safer than blankets by the American Association of Pediatrics (AAP). AAP also recommends that blankets can be used from two years onwards. It is acceptable to use an AC or ceiling fan to regulate the temperature as long as the baby is not in the way of direct breeze from AC or fan. When in doubt if the clothing and room temperature is right, feel your baby’s head or the neck (not hands or feet) to ensure they are comfortably warm, not sweaty.

Some babies are sensitive to light and noise. So keep the bedroom dark, cool, and quiet. Use blackout curtains and white noise if it helps mask the sound from traffic and neighbourhood. Investing in dim lights (0.5 watt bulbs) can be helpful for parents for checking on the baby but if the baby were to wake up the dim light will signal that it’s still nighttime and time to return back to sleep.

Dealing with Development Leaps

If a good sleeper started more night waking recently, check for signs of teething, nap transitions and development leaps. Wait for a week, things should be back to their usual routine without any intervention.

If nightwaking does not reduce even after correcting the discomforts and is more frequent than the range suggested above, work on nighttime routines.

Right Nighttime Routines

Avoid stimulation before bedtime. This includes screentime and rough play near bedtime.

Maintain a calm, consistent and predictable bedtime routine to reduce night-time anxiety in the children. For example, this could be bath, massage, feed, lullaby and bed. Use familiar bedtime cues, same song, words, or comfort object (for older children). Create your own routine depending on your preference, the preferences of your child and practical constraints such as the amount of time and energy you have left at the end of the day.

Helping Baby during Night Waking

It is understandable that during the period the baby is learning to sleep more independently, parents will have to help out respond to night wakings. Pause for two to three minites before intervening as some active sleeping babies might self-settle within a minute or two without intervention.

When support is required during the night waking, offer gentle touch or words instead of immediate feeding, rocking or carrying about. Respond quietly and with minimal stimulation if comfort is needed. You can introduce patting and shushing to your child. You can also use verbal reassurance from the age of five months.

Babies learn through routine and repetition. Stay consistent and patient.

Managing Fatigue Caused by Multiple Night Wakings in Parents

The first three months are really tough on moms. Dads or family members can help out a few of the night feeds with bottle feeding – expressed or formula. Seek advice from a lactation consultant, if you need help.

Beyond four months, the night wakings become fewer and predictable. Time your own bedtime such that you get to sleep in multiples of one and half hours before the baby wakes. Waking at the end of the sleep cycle or at the beginning of the sleep cycle causes less fatigue than waking up in the middle of your sleep cycle. Optimising for your own sleep will mean that you will be less tired despite having to support your baby through the night.

Restrict caffeine intake and avoid caffeine after 2 p.m. Taking a short 20-30 mins nap in the afternoon can help recover some of your strength for the second half till you retire to bed at night.

Breaking night waking patterns takes time, patience, and gentleness. With time and consistency, it is possible to create a good sleep routine.